IN THE CULTURE war over homosexuality both sides are deploying heavy rhetorical artillery.  The air is full of bold claims and extreme characterizations.  Sexual egalitarians often dismiss opposition to the gay and lesbian agenda as prejudice. “Homophobia” is said to deny rights that are basic to human dignity and personal fulfillment and, indeed, to produce misery and suicide. On the other hand, opponents of gay rights describe that movement as an expression of self-indulgent immorality. They depict it as an assault on the sanctity of marriage and the health of children and, ultimately, as a threat to the moral fabric of Western civilization.